Parade Poop Wars

[Mellifluous]

I was just notified that my "group" for the parade on Sunday will have to provide a scooper. No where in the rules does it say that and I think it is a little silly to start making requirements at this late date, not to mention I think multiple scoopers is a little overkill. Here is the e-mail that I sent to the parade coordinator. I tried to keep it light but get my point across.

Will he think that I am off my rocker?

Hello Mr. Craver

Thanks for sending the information. I faxed my group's entry form in yesterday so we should be good to go. I do have a couple of questions for you.

First, where will the horse staging area be? Will it be with the floats or with the walkers?

Second, I have heard that there is a potential poop problem. It seems that the inevitable poop needs to be scooped. My suggestion is that the parade organizers provide a pooper scooper. Each rider will be charged a poop fee upon their arrival. The fees will then be used to pay the pooper scooper. This is about the safest and most effeceint way to take care of pasture muffins in the street. If each group must search out and provide their own pooper scooper, you end up with multiple people wielding implements of scooping and potentially driving the dreaded ATVs with poop trailers down the parade route. There is also the problem of whose poop belongs to who. There could be unclaimed poop or worse, poop custody disputes!

You also have to keep in mind that there are probably going to be an untold number of people showing up out of the blue because that is how it has been done in the past. What happens to their horse's poop?

PS - Clarkesville charges a $2 poop fee. I think that they had around 50 horses so that was a pretty good payment for the scooper! You could adjust your fee according to the projected number of horses. I would not mind paying $5 or so.

Thanks!

Feel free to give me a call if you need to discuss this further. xxx-xxx-xxxx or xxx-xxx-xxxx

Mel

[Heidi]

"unclaimed poop or poop custody disputes" Ah, you killed me! :lol:

I liked the light tone of your letter and I really, REALLY liked the idea of one scooper paid by poop-fees from the riders.
The ONLY reason I could see this person balking, is if different groups did not ride together and were interspersed throughout the parade and would need a scooper at the back of each horse group before other parade entries tread upon said pasture muffins.
h

[Jane Hurl]

?????

Up here, whenever there is a parade with critters in it, the city sweepers follow at the end of the parade. (That's how you know the parade is over!)

To do otherwise would, in my opinion, look odd. A person with a scooper trailing behind each horse? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

[Mellifluous]

Yay!

I think it worked. I just got this response:

The horses will line up with the riding groups. Do't worry about the poop. We'll take care of it. The horses will be last in line.
Sent via BlackBerry from Cingular Wireless


I just noticed that I misspelled efficient. Opps, and I ran spell check. Oh well, he misspelled don't.

Jane - the SOP for parades down here is to either charge a fee, require diapers or make each group provide their own pooper scooper. In my opinion, the fee makes the most sense.

[pnalley]

I'm happy to live in the country.

We don't worry about poop in the roads.

A little rain and it makes great fertilizer :smile:

[TrueStepPaso]

Mel....i hate that rule too. When I went to the NYC parade, it was provided for us..thank gawd. Then in my Plymouth 4th of July parade we had to provide our own, and the poor little girls were mortified each time they had to do it because the crowd clapped & whistled :-? ....then, in my recent X-mas parade, it was taken care of by....the town..??

Anywho, for me, its enough to discourage me from a parade because that is the feeling they are giving me anyways....like horses are a nuisance :-? .
Next year, I will also propose a fee at the rider's expense for the TOWN to provide for such a thing.......truthfully, I think its ridiculous....its just poop, fer gawds sake. Its not forever..... :roll:

[Terri]

I believe Abbey that we were at the end of the parade for a reason and I think the town took care of it. But this is why is works to ride with the club, our parade co-ordinator works that stuff out with the town and let us know what we need to. The club also provide liability insurance.

Some people are just nutz about the poop on the road issue. Last week as a friend and I were riding down the rode, a big Dunkin Donut truck passed us, banging along at full speed. And as I was trying to get Rio back down out from the telephone pole he was climbing, a lady in a minivan pulled up next to us and lowered her window and asked "Is someone going to come back and pick up the poop in the road?" Now killer was, MY horses hadn't pooped! She was pointed back toward a section of road we were heading to, NOT coming from. So I didn't know of what poop she spoke and I was busy trying to calm a dancing horse. So I simply replied "nope, probably not" She got mad and drove away. My friend wondered if she stopped every dog owner she sees and askes if they clean up. Then we decided the best answer would have been "No, are you gonna come back and clean up the greenhouse emmissions you are generating" :twisted: Why couldn't we think of that at the time? Good grief, it is a country Rd!

I am glad this is working out for you Mel, you can come write a letter for me anytime! you are very clever.

[JennLM]

Wait... they make diapers for horses???? Or do they use extra large Depends? lol

[TrueStepPaso]

No...she means those ugly poop bags hanging from theor rear....who looks cool in a parade with those things?!

Terri....Its ppl like that bored, pathetic, miserable, sexless wench that I utterly can't stand for even one millisecond....I would have told her where to shove that poop. :-? You are too kind. ;-)

[Centauress]

OMG I agree Abbie! That chick sounds like one of those miserable people determined to make everyone around them miserable as well...what a WENCH!!! :evil:

When someone acts like that with me I make sure I smile real big and act even nicer to them - trust me, it drives them even nuttier! :twisted:

[Terri]

Hey, Kim, I found out later who it was.......(drum roll please) the daughter of the lady selling the house on Elm, you know the one who Won't sell to horse owners. :evil:

[Mellifluous]

Check out the bun bag. Good grief.

http://www.bunbag.com/

[Centauress]

Terri- was that the house I was looking at???

[TrueStepPaso]

I can just hear it now, "NICE bun bags, lady...." :roll:


I'd like to take both of my horses over to her house to dance the Cha-Cha all over her front lawn....how do ya like them road apples beeotch! :twisted:

[Centauress]

Good idea Abbie - we'll use PJ's head for the maracas!! :lol:

[TrueStepPaso]

:lol: Yeah...he can dance to the sound of his own....head. :shock:

[ErinC]

:shock: you guys are nutz :shock:

[Terri]

Yeah, they are probably gonna get me in trouble.

[Centauress]

:lol:

[TrueStepPaso]

Who us? Naaaaaa....


C'moon Terri....ya know you wanna be baaaad...http://www.messengerfreak.com/emoticons/funny/darkside_cookies.gif

[Terri]

welllll....as long as cookies are involved...hmmmmm

[TrueStepPaso]

Gotcha! Geeee, you're as easy as me...dangle a cookie in front of me & its equivalent to this --->http://www.messengerfreak.com/emoticons/other/Hypnotise.gif

[dana]

Here's some first hand experience on bun bags for you. we have to use these on the clydesdales that we drive every Saturday because we are giving rides at one of the major resorts in the area.

the gentleman i help out designed his own. they have a metal frame inside to keep them from collapsing. the inside is lined with a heavy duty kitchen garbage bag. around the inside of the top, there are leather snaps to hold them in place until they need "changed" :D

they are put under the tail but over the crupper and have one of those squeeze clips to attach them to two sets of straps that come down. the two straps attach to the sides of the bag to help hold it up also with the sqeeze clips and the second set of straps attach to the sides of the harness lower down to keep it from swinging too far. you then velcro over the outside of the horses tail. the theory being that as the horse lifts the tail to poop, it opens the bag. it's still not 100% effective but close. ;-)

in order to change them, you take the velcro off the tail and undo the two squeeze clips on the sides of the bag, swing the bag in a 180 and pull off the leather snaps that hold the bag inside, pull out the bag, carefully avoiding dropping it on the foot of the "guest" that walks by you loudly saying "Ewwwwww!" and drawing everyone's attention to what you're doing. replace with new bag. the worst thing is about these bags is you have no view of a horses bum. without them it's wonderful to see them start up a hill and watch their muscles ripple up from their legs and into their butt.

the ones we use have sheepskin for the area under the tail and where it bumps against their legs to keep them from rubbing and making them sore. and it will happen if you don't keep the bags changed after they poo. i really don't mind changing them. it's just part of having horses. i don't normally say anything to all the comments that people make but when i get a really rude one, i usually tell them "well, we certainly can't have you city people stepping in it" :shock: it's like they think hands can't be washed.

that usually shuts them up. :D

[motorgypsy]

As much as we love horses though I do remember as a member of the band with our spit shine polished black shoes having to step over or around the big piles of horse poo or we'd get demerits if our shoes got messed up. So it certainly is better to put the horses last or have the scooper right behind them!!!

The one I thought was funny was a lady who owned two horses complaining because our horses pooped on the right-away of the road in front of her house. But she had problems!!